Big Weenie

I don't understandWhy are you being so mean?You're mean mean man[Chorus]You are just jealous of meCuz you, you just can't do what I doSo instead of just admitting itYou walk around and sayAll kinds of really mean thingsAbout me cuz you're a meanie, a meanieBut it's only cuz you'reJust really jealous of meCuz I'm what you want to beSo you just look like an idiotWhen you say these mean thingsCuz it's too easy to seeYou're really just a big weenie, big weenie[Verse 1]Alright listen, I need you to focusI need you to go dig deep in your mind, this is importantWe are going to perform an experiment of the sortsI'm going to have to ask you to bear with me for a momentNow I need you to open your mind-your eyes close themYou are now about to be placed under my hypnosisFor the next four and a half minutesWe are going to explore into your mindTo find out why you're so fuckin' jealousNow why did they make Yoo-Hoo?Hippity ga-ga boo-booPsych, I'm kiddingI just wanted to see if you're still listenin'Ok, now I need your undivided attentionSir I have a questionWhy do I always sense this undeniable tensionFrom the moment that I enter into the roomIt gets all quiet and whispersWhenever theres conversation, why am I always mentioned?I've been dying to ask, it's been itchin' at meIs it just because[Chorus][Verse 2]Alright now I, I just flubbed a lineI was going to say something extremely importantBut I forgot who or what it was, I fucked upPsych, I'm kidding again you idiot, no I didn'tThat's just what you wanted to hear from meIs that I fucked up ain't it?But I can bust one take without lookin' at no paperIt doesn't take a bunch of takesOr me to stand here in this booth all dayFor me to say the truth, ok?You're droolin, you have tooth decayYour mouth is open, you're disgustingWhat the fuck you eat for lunchA bunch of sweets or something, what?You munch a bunch of Crunch 'N Munch?Your tooth is rotten to the gumYour breath stinks, wanna chew some gum?Yes I do sir, what am I on?You sir are on truth syrumMarshall I'm so jealous of youPlease say you won't tell nobodyI'd be so embarrassed, I'm just absolutely terrifiedThat someone's gonna find out why I'm sayingAll these terrible, evil and awful mean thingsIt's my own insecurity![Chorus][Verse 3]Alright now we, we're going to conductThat experiment that we were talking about earlierJust to see what a frog looks like when it takes two hits of ecstasyCuz that's exactly what your eyes look like, want to check to see?Here's a mirror, notice the resemblence here?Wait, let me put these sun glasses onNow look in this mirror, how about now?What do you have in common?You're both green with envy and look like idiots with sunglasses on 'emYou look like I sound like singing about weeniesNow take my weenie out of your mouthThis is between me and you, I know you're not happyI know you'd much rather see me lying in the corner of a room somewhere cryingCurled up in a ball tweeked out of my mind dyingThere is no denying that my weenie is much bigger than yours isMine is like sticking a banana between two orangesWhy you even doing this to yourself, it's pointlessWhy do we have to keep on going through this, this is tortuousMy point is thisThat if you say mean things, weenie will shrinkNow I fogot what the chorus is, your just is...[Chorus]